Space-between-spaces

...but I try and I'd like to be. Today I'd like to talk about something that bothers me about myself and modern culture. When I was a child I watched a show called Teen Titans that, in one episode, specifically addressed an issue that a lot of modern shows like to hit frequently nowadays. The topic is discrimination. Whenever people address someone or something they see as discriminatory it doesn't take long before these same individuals say things like hoping the offensive person dies or they hope something horrible happens to them. On top of that it kinda seems like television shows in this generation are either cartoons based in madness with no reason which I suspect is designed to dumb children down or they wear discrimination on their sleeve to remind everyone that someone is always being a discriminative a-hole and deserve to be despised. I don't need to address which shows these are, I imagine all of you can think of some that seem to match these traits.

There's in episode in the fourth season of the Teen Titans where they meet this guy who seems to be in a fight with a robotic species that are flying ships. This superhero, of sorts, ends up destroying these ships with his bare hands on a couple of occasions, which does a great job of impressing the Titans. Around the start of the episode he kinda disrespects Starfire and around the middle it's revealed he has a problem with Starfire's alien species which is shown through him calling her a "troq". In my opinion this episode did a great job of addressing discrimination without citing a specific example of it but I think they do hint at racism subtly with Cyborg. The reason I'm so fond of this episode is not because they overcome the racist who talks down to Starfire but because she still decides to save his life even knowing that he thinks so lowly of her. Even when she could have left him to die, she doesn't and she says an ideal that I suspect I may have, at some point, forgotten. "You may not value my life, but I still value yours."

The reason that one line hits me so personally is that even though I frequently tell my brother or occasionally my friends that they should aspire to be the better man by not lowering themselves to their enemy's level, I regret to say that I frequently don't value the lives of those I would consider an enemy to my core values even knowing many of them would do the same to me. I realize that by not better looking inward to who I am and what I believe I suspect that I may have let myself become a monster controlled by his anger. I can't be the better man by leaving those I despise to worse fates or by embracing my anger but I don't seem to know anything else. I don't know what I can do if my anger isn't in it. I feel like I can't know peace because I don't have anything without my anger. I want to be a good person and a better man but I realize now that I'm not much different than the generation of millennials who wish death upon those who they don't agree with.

I'm Spacy and there is one behaviour among people that irritates me to no end. This behaviour is self-entitlement. At one time I mistakenly found this fault to be exclusive to youth but it's a sin we all share. I know I wasn't above the fault of self-entitlement when I was a boy. I work at a place where people, usually elderly people, walk in and expect the security guard (me) to go out of their way to assist them. It's insane because they refuse to read signs that tell them what to do or when the workers will be back. I know the younger are expected to carry the previous generation but why has it reached the point that elderly people are willing to let all their senses turn to trash all while the the young around them give up everything to help them? How did it get to this point? Why does everyone think they are special?

Knowing my contempt for people who repeatedly exploit others if not arguing in favour of going easy on the elderly are likely asking if I would think better of the younger generation but I regret to say "no". This is due to people I regarded as friends. Now I'm not so sure. There are two men who both do things that make me think less of young people as a whole. Both of them are, or just should be, regular men. They aren't famous. One seems to be obsessed with guilting me by reminding me of something he can't let go of. The other persistently works at being the anime protagonist archetype that insists on always winning as soon as any wager is presented even if it's just a small thing. These minor character flaws wouldn't piss me off so much except these two do this shit when they both know I'm already exhausted and tired of people. Neither of them take the time to just stop and act like decent fucking people to each other and if I don't completely devote myself to one they both fucking focus the full intensity of their personality on me.

"I remember a few years back when you gave him a strategy to beat me." The irony is I didn't give either of them a strategy to beat the other. I recommended a single move to one because it was an effective and common method for pokemon battlers to prevent others from disrupting their strategies at that time. It was a single move, taunt. I am frequently guilted by this one because I recommended a common move in the competitive meta to the other.

"Oh. All right then. But I was hoping you would anyway... But now I have to fight hard...to win." I would like to think you said this with purely benevolent intent but somehow that's not what I see. It feels much more mean spirited like a fighter insisting he'll go to any length, "to win". If you're the person who said this then don't bother with apologies or revealing yourself in the comments because it would only hurt you to expose these aspects of your personality to others.

Neither of them realize, I have zero interest in helping them win nor am I interested in seeing which one is actually the best of the two. I just want them to treat each other with some god damn decency, maybe some respect. To see the loser treat the winner with respect even though he really wanted to win, that's a good person. I'm not asking for much, just to see two people humble themselves. Now, I have a different wager for the match. If you two can show some common decency to your foe and some humility regardless of whether you win or lose then we will continue to be friends. If either of you fail to treat the other with kindness, respect, and humility then the the last of my fondness for either of you will be poured into a picture. This picture will be of both of you treating each other as if you were long time friends. It will serve as a reflection of a world I will never have the pleasure of experiencing. You don't have to like each other but you can still treat the other with goodwill.

I'm tired of watching my friends fight. It's killing me.

...thus they would put us in serious danger if they start trying to make demands of the guard.

If you work in security then you likely understand the complaint I'm about to explain. So today while explaining that by depriving the security guard access to the cameras and requiring that the security guard just stand up front they are making his job harder. They don't realize that should a deranged lunatic walk in with a firearm the security guard will likely be the first person to be shot. There are three levels of security guard in that company's system. Level one guards only carry a note pad and pen which will not ultimately provide anything vaguely resembling protection. The level one guards are not supposed to fight with violent or aggressive individuals and are, if they MUST confront them, try to calm them down with words. Confrontation is not recommended. That being said it is supposed to be the least dangerous positions.

With level two guards they have access to batons and tasers if they are approved for those. These guards are put in more dangerous locations so the possibility of danger or violence increases. They could be expected to ward off druggies or possibly more aggressive individuals. Calm non-confrontational methods are still preferred.

Level three guards are guaranteed to handle violence at some point in the workplace and is the highest rank expected which grants them access to firearms although they need to pass special qualifications for that. Calm non-confrontational methods are still preferred but not always available.

The reason I've gone through the effort to explain this is because these various co-workers mistakenly believe that this means a level one security guard is required to protect them. First major violent situation occurs and the level one security guard is going to go to a phone to call the police, assuming they haven't been blown away. The reason these beliefs are mistaken is because security guards are not police and can only act with the same authority as a citizen when it comes to arrests or confrontation but the company specifically advises against these actions. The reason why I mention that is because Police are not legally bound to take immediate action which means if it puts the guard in danger they can effectively turn their backs on said co-workers. If they start telling the low ranking guard how to do his job then he might give them the bare minimum effort to offer anything vaguely resembling protection which might be nothing at all. You know I'd be hiding under the desk as soon as the first major violent incident occurs because of the stupid beliefs these co-workers have. They are the people who end up getting the people around them hurt or killed because they had to be a Karen.

I'd like to pose a question to you all. If I were god and my entire life was just the time I've taken to test all of humanity do you believe you would pass? Do you believe the world would pass? I ponder this because every day I wake up to a nightmare filled with people who utterly hate each other.

In the states, they think they are one of the most civilized countries on the planet. Yet, I have seen a disturbing amount of violence recently and it all feels politically motivated. Politically they are using every loophole to undermine the democratically determined authority. There's so much violence and people who are willing to commit said violence in the name of their own political interests. I haven't heard from a friend of mine who was one of the few friends I have in the states so I fear that he may be dead.

In Russia, that regime led to them forcing Ukrainians from their homes. They've committed countless war crimes all due to Putin's ego. So many people who didn't want anything to do with that conflict have been executed while trying to leave on paths the Russian government told them would be safe. People like to think that Russia started this war in February but it's actually been a conflict they've instigated for years.

China's economy looks like it's about to crash. That doesn't bother me too much but if their economy crashes then it would negatively effect the world economy. No one seems to understand the ramifications of such an event.

The world is experiencing a ridiculous amount of unusual weather patterns and to some degree even realize it's due to the green house gases that are being produced by coal, oil, and plastics being thrown everywhere. We are not seeing any first world countries embracing more ecologically friendly methods of fuel.

So I remind you, if I were god do you believe you would pass? Do you believe the world would pass? Those answers don't have to be the same and this is more of a thought experiment so feel free to share your opinions on these matters.

In America, right now, they are disputing Roe v. Wade. I do not recall abortion hurting the rights of Christians or Republicans yet for some reason they feel the need to trample over the rights of those who want to have abortions. Maybe a woman has been raped and doesn't want to carry her rapist's child or maybe giving birth would kill her. Let's assume that most of the states outlaw abortion completely, it reintroduces back alley abortions, a sudden spike in the population, and a spike in unwanted children.

Why do Americans do this? Why is history forced to repeat solely so they can suffer the same mistakes that their grandfathers and great grandfathers made? Why is their entire existence built around increasing the problems in their culture?

I hope that they see the evils I've described inflicted upon them and their families. I notice they seem to care more when they are the victim, maybe that's what they need.